Book Release/Extract: Making It Up As I Go Along by Marian Keyes

Making It Up As I Go Along (Notes By A Small Woman) by Marian Keyes has its paperback release today (released by Penguin) and is available in most UK bookshops and online.

Welcome to the magnificent Making It Up as I Go Along – aka the World According to Marian Keyes™ – A bold and brilliant collection of Marian’s hilarious and often heartfelt observations on modern life, love and everything in between.

From a guide to breaking up with your hairdresser to entering the fifties-zone, the joys of her nail varnish museum to singing her way through insomnia, Marian will have you laughing with delight and gasping with recognition throughout – because at the end of the day, each and every one of us is clearly making it up as we go along.

I have reviewed the book below but first, thanks to Marian and Penguin, I am able to share an extract from Making It Up As I Go Along with you. Enjoy….

Writers I Love

May I tell you about what turned out to be one of the happiest days of my entire life? I may? Tanken yew! Well! You know Sali Hughes, the brilliant journalist who writes for the Guardian on a Saturday and the Pool on a Wednesday? And has her own website, salihughesbeauty.com, where she does great videos called ‘In the Bathroom’, where she visits the bathrooms of famous and/or interesting people and discusses their beauty products and skincare and whatnot? Well, I’ve been a fan of hers for a long time because while she really loves all things beauty, she’s entirely honest and reliable and informative. She knows everything.
We first came into contact when I twittered asking people what I should do about the little broken capillaries on my face and everyone told me to email Sali – and she emailed me back immediately, giving me a variety of options and telling me the upsides and downsides of each. And after that we stayed in touch, and even though we hadn’t met in real life I loved her already because she has great sweetness and gentleness coupled with razor-sharp intelligence.

Also, she gives airtime to all kinds of brands, they don’t have to be big names and expensive, so she’s in nobody’s pocket, so I know that what she writes in her columns is genuinely impartial. Also, she’s wonderful for giving exposure to new and emerging brands, which thrills me because I am a divil for ‘New and Exciting’.

And now she’s after writing a book, called Pretty Honest, and it is the ABSOLUTE BEAUTY BIBLE – it covers everything from the very basics, such as identifying your skin type, to how to manage your beauty when you’re going through something awful like cancer, and she demystifies the ‘anti-ageing’ industry, separating out cod science from things that do actually work. (As well as acknowledging that there’s nothing wrong with looking your age – basically she gives you every option.)

Every woman should have this book. Because beauty stuff is a passionate hobby of mine, I thought I knew a bit, but compared to Sali I know nothing and I’ve already consulted the book many times.
So anyway, there I am, living in Dublin and, you know, living a quiet life, seeing my mammy and the Redzers and the Praguers and going for walks with Himself and Posh Kate and Posh Malcolm – when Sali sends me this invitation to a lunch. A foncy lunch – being thrown for her by Bobbi Brown – yes! The make-up brand Bobbi Brown! And I was invited!

There were only twenty people invited and I was one of them – and when I saw the list of the other invitees, didn’t I nearly get sick! They were all writers or journalists that I hold in HUGE regard: India Knight, Jojo Moyes, Sam Baker, Polly Samson, Miranda Sawyer, Hadley Freeman, Lucy Mangan, Maria McErlane, Georgia Garrett, Julia Raeside, Jo Elvin, Camilla Long, Sophie Heawood, Bryony Gordon and Sarah Morgan. Also invited were three amazing women from the Estée Lauder group: Jay Squier, Cheryl Joannides and Anna Bartle.

My immediate impulse was that I couldn’t possibly go, that I didn’t belong, that I wouldn’t fit in, and then I thought, ‘Feck it! I want to go. I’m GOING!’
And this was huge for me because I’ve been mad in the head (MITH) for so long that I’ve had to keep my life very small and safe because it was all that I could cope with. But I realized I was ready to go into a daunting, intimidating situation and try to hold my own.

And off I went. And I really hope you don’t think I’m being a boasty-boaster, I just wanted to let you know that if you’ve suffered from the MITH-ness yourself and you think you’ll always feel terrible, it may not be the case for ever.

I ‘jetted’ in from Dublin – normally, when I travel by air, I simply fly, but because this was so glamorous I ‘jetted’ – and the lunch was upstairs in the private room in Balthazar and I had to scuttle past the welcoming committee to go to the Ladies to do last-minute checks on myself, only to discover that – horrors! – I’d somehow managed to leave Dublin without my comb!

For a brief but very real moment I contemplated scuttling back past the welcoming committee, leaving Balthazar and going back to the airport and flying home – yes, ‘flying’ home, no ‘jetting’ this time, it would be an ignominious return – and never contacting any of the people here today ever again. Then I remembered a day long ago when my mammy couldn’t find any of her combs, because all of her daughters had stolen them, and she had to go to Mass (not a Sunday but a holy day of obligation) and she ended up having to comb her hair with a fork. Inspired by her ingenuity, I resolved that as soon as was polite, I’d secrete a fork from the table into my handbag and race back to the Ladies and sort my hair out that way.

So in I went to the room and I was appallingly nervous – the first person I saw was Camilla Long – Camilla Long! In real life! And then I met Sali and my hands were shaking so much, my fingers were all fumbly. But she was the kindest, nicest woman you could meet, and exquisite-looking, like a doll.

And as it transpired, everyone was INCREDIBLY nice. The only person I’d properly met before, apart from the amazing Jay Squier, was the wonderful novelist and co-founder of the Pool Sam Baker, who is very grounded and calm and kind, and she passed on a little of her calmness to me. And she was with Jojo Moyes – Jojo Moyes! My love, my admiration, my downright jealousy of Jojo’s talent knows no bounds. But would you believe, Jojo had also forgotten her comb! So I decided that if someone as amazing as Jojo Moyes had forgotten her comb, forgetting one’s comb was actually admirable. Perhaps it could become a ‘thing’. A bit like the ice-bucket challenge – where you go out for the evening without your comb . . .? No, maybe not. Sorry. Not all my ideas are runners . . .

Then I met Miranda Sawyer, the music journalist, who is so cooooollll! But she was extremely welcoming and warm and fun and that did a huge amount to put me at my ease.
So we were standing around having drinks, and I went mad and had a Diet Coke because of the day that was in it, and before I knew it, I was in the thick of things.

Initially I was acting, trying hard to chat and act normal and not keel over with intimidation, but after a while it became real – and then I discovered I was enjoying myself. Like, really enjoying myself.
And when we sat down for the lunch I discovered several things:

1) A personalized name tag – while we’d been doing our chatting and mingling an illustrator had sat in the room and sketched each of us. I’ve never encountered a more charming, delightful gesture ever.

2) I was seated on Sali’s right hand, which was a massive honour.

3) On my other side was India Knight, and oh my GOD! She’s incredible! Utterly hilarious – I nearly got sick laughing – and entertaining and warm and vital and alive and passionate and smart as a whip.

4) A Bobbi Brown goodie bag next to my side plate. It took EVERYTHING IN MY POWER to stop myself from ripping it open and kissing the things inside.

5) I was seated opposite Hadley Freeman, who is the nicest, nicest person and was so complimentary about Ireland that I totally fell in love with her.

6) Maria McErlane was sort of diagonally across from me and she was another one that had me choking with laughter.

7) Diagonally across from me on the other side was the aforementioned lovely Miranda Sawyer.What was very interesting was the atmosphere in the room – there was nothing but love. I’m very attuned to undercurrents and unspoken tension and there was absolutely none. Everyone was so happy for Sali and everyone seemed genuinely thrilled to be in such a beautiful room, eating such delicious food, and being with such lovely people. And there was no one-upmanship or posturing or ‘Oh yeah? So when’s your book coming out? Because my book . . .’ And believe me, I’ve been at my fair share of those sorts of competitive yokes over the years and this was nothing like them.

I was having such a great time that the hours rattled by and before I knew it, it was four o’clock and I had to leave to ketch my flight to ‘jet’ back to Dublin (definitely ‘jetting’), and as I was leaving I had a little chat with Lucy Mangan and, to be honest, I was afeerd of Lucy Mangan because she’s such a passionate defender of the poorest and most deprived people in Britain that I thought she’d dismiss me as a fluffy eejit airhead. But! Would you believe that we talked about shoes! Yes! We both have abnormally small feet and we bonded over what a pain in the arse it is to never be able to find shoes to fit.

Then off I went, and because everyone was so great and because it’s not that long since I was so mad in the head that I couldn’t even get out of bed, it was one of the best days of my entire life.

My verdict of Making It Up As I Go Along: 

I usually don’t read non-fiction but ‘the world according to Marian Keyes’ is something I wasn’t going to miss reading. Making It Up As I Go Along is a collection of Marian’s tales, stories and flights of fancy. She hilariously gives us her take on her hairdresser, her love of nail varnish, her version of what makes up a perfect chemist as well as her buying boots that make her look like Bono.

This book has the same honesty, warmth and humour that Marian puts into her novels. What is good about this book is that you can either read it in one go or you can dip in and out, picking any chapter/article that takes your fancy.

Can I also just say how much I love the cover. The orange makes me feel happy whenever I pick it up.

This book is funny (and I mean laugh out loud funny,) relatable and brutally honest. Marian Keyes is the kind of writer I’d love to meet and have a laugh with. She tells things like they are.

If you’re looking for something funny and a bit different to the usual fiction or non fiction, this book is perfect.
I loved it. It’s fantastic. If you’re a fan of Caitlin Moran’s How To Be A Woman (which I am,) this is also definitely the book for you.

Can I come and hang out with you now, Marian? Pretty Please?

About Marian Keyes:

Marian Keyes’ international bestselling novels include Rachel’s Holiday, Last Chance Saloon, Sushi for Beginners, Angels, The Other Side of the Story, Anybody Out There, This Charming Man and The Woman Who Stole My Life. Three collections of her journalism, Under the Duvet, Further Under the Duvet and Making It Up as I Go Along, are also available from Penguin. Marian lives in Dublin with her husband.

For more information on Marion and her novels, visit http://www.mariankeyes.com

by

Laura

I’m Laura. I started Novel Kicks in 2009. I wanted a place to post my writing as well as give other writers like me the opportunity to do the same. There is also a monthly book club, a writing room which features writing prompts, book reviews, competitions, author interviews and guest posts.

I grew up by the sea (my favourite place in the world) and I currently live in Hampshire. I am married to Chris, have a cat named Buddy and I would love to be a writer. I’m trying to write the novel I’ve talked so much about writing if only I could stop pressing delete. I’ve loved writing since creative writing classes in primary school. I have always wanted to see my teacher Miss Sayers again and thank her for the encouragement. When not trying to write the novel or writing snippets of stories on anything I can get my hands on, I love reading, dancing like a loon and singing to myself very badly. My current obsession is Once Upon a Time and I would be happy to live with magic in the enchanted forest surrounded by all those wonderful stories provided that world also included Harry Potter. I love reading chick lit. contemporary fiction and novels with mystery.